Burning

I love a man...
named Jesus.

Out of nowhere tonight I have this deep deep burning in my soul. I need to think about this.
Well, today was good, I had rehearsal all day, and then I went to see a Easter play called "Freedom" which was excellent. Afterwards I got to go out with some of the kids from the church and their youth pastor, when I left, this burning started?

Let's rewind, the play I saw, wonderful. God was so present, and the power He has over Satan, and any other puny problem was so visible, my heart just yearned to be a part of it, and I think that's where the burning started. Then when I hung out with Christian friends, and their Youth leader, people I can talk to and just feel so good with, I felt like I wanted to be a part of that as well. And now, I find myself, sitting in this basement, ranting about this burning in my chest.

God, buddy, my lover, what are you saying? I love you, and tonight I feel like this passion and splash of water was poured on my face again. I need that every so often to keep me going through it all. A part of me so badly wants to just quit my life, and go into a school where I can learn about God, and sing, and act and dance simply for one purpose. The other part of me is scared? Or maybe like, that will never happen anyway. But the thing is, my heart lately has definetely been telling me to put all my effort on one thing, and there is no question what the "thing" is.

To be honest bloggers, I left my journal at home, so I am somewhat using this, I apologize.

God, I want an infinite amount of joy, I feel like my joy meter has weakened lately and I'm not sure why, I think I am getting tired, I need a boost God. I don't want to be alone anymore Jesus.

It's funny, as soon as I say that I think of Jesus, He didn't want to be alone when He had to save the world, be He told God He would, and He did... I am in No way saying that I am Jesus or going to save the world, but man, God, lay it on me.
Tonight, the realization of how much I love you, and why occured, so here I am, open arms, waiting.

You know, I love you,
Colton